Vote for me, and all your wildest dreams will come true.
Efren Ramirez, Napoleon Dynamite (2004)
"Well, what is there to eat?" "Knock it off, Napoleon! Just make yourself a dang quesadilla!"Napoleon
Sorry I'm late. I just got done taming a wild honeymoon stallion for you guys.Napoleon
Tina, you fat lard, come get some dinner! Tina! Eat the FOOD!Napoleon
I see you're drinking 1%. Does that mean you think you're fat? Cause you're not. You could be drinking whole if you wanted to.Napoleon
Is that what you're trying to do? Ruin my life and make me look like a freakin' idiot!Napoleon
How much do you want to bet I can throw this football over them mountains?Uncle Rico
Napoleon, don't be jealous that I've been chatting online with babes all day. Besides, we both know that I'm training to be a cage fighter.Kip
"What about your girlfriend?" "Well, things are getting pretty serious right now. I mean, we chat online for, like, two hours every day so I guess you could say things are gettin' pretty serious."Kip
"How was school?"
"The worst day of my life, what do you think?"
"Do you think people will vote for me?" "Heck yes! I'd vote for you."Napoleon
Well, you have a sweet bike. And you're really good at hooking up with chicks. Plus you're like the only guy at school who has a mustache.Napoleon
"Who are you gonna ask?" "That girl over there." "Summer Wheatly? How the heck are you gonna do that?" "Build her a cake or something."Napoleon
What the flip was grandma doing at the sand dunes?Napoleon
You think I got where I am today because I dressed like Peter Pan over here?Rex
"What's a liger?" "It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed... bred for its skills in magic."Napoleon
You think anybody wants a roundhouse lick to the face while I'm wearing these bad boys? Forget about it.Rex
It took me like three hours to finish the shading on your upper lip. It's probably the best drawing I've ever done.Napoleon
Nunchuck skills... bowhunting skills... computer hacking skills... Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills!Napoleon