Oh my GOD, you are NOT bisexual! Don't be stupid! I mean, I went to a bar mitzvah once, that doesn't make me Jewish!
When I am at home, I never go near the synagogue unless, say, there is a bar or bat mitzvah involving the children of friends. But when I am traveling, in a country where Jewish life is scarce or endangered, I often make a visit to the shul.christopher hitchens