This show is our own personal beliefs.
YouTube video, in response to an audience question, "How do you keep your own personal beliefs from showing up in the show?"
Finally, a guy who says what people who aren't thinking are thinking.Jon Stewart
I signed up for what? I thought I was just ordering cable.Jon Stewart
I don't know what all the controversy is about, quite frankly. I've met Eminem, I met him backstage, and he's really gay.Jon Stewart
Do you guys have to sell everything? I'd like to buy the Earth's core.Jon Stewart
Everybody thought Barack Obama was going to [inspire people] when he came to Washington, but, you know, the Senate seems like the place where smart people go to die.Jon Stewart
Here's the way I look at it. President Bush has uranium-tipped bunker busters and I have puns. I think he'll be OK.Jon Stewart
I have complete faith in the continued absurdity of whatever’s going on.Jon Stewart
Fatherhood is great because you can ruin someone from scratch.Jon Stewart
You're on CNN. The show that leads into me is puppets making crank phone calls. What is wrong with you?Jon Stewart
We look at, the absurdity of the system provides us the most material. And that is best served by sort of the theater of it all, you know, which, by the way, thank you both, because it's been helpful.Jon Stewart
They said I wasn't being funny. And I said to them, "I know that, but tomorrow I will go back to being funny, and your show will still blow."Jon Stewart
I think the metric by which television is considered liberal is literally based on the metric of liberalism in each person's soul. Peoples' senses of humor tend to go about as far as their ideology.Jon Stewart
The best-laid plans of mice and comedians usually wind up on the cutting-room floor.Jon Stewart