No, sir, th' dimmycratic party ain't on speakin' terms with itsilf. Whin ye see two men with white neckties go into a sthreet car an' set in opposite corners while wan mutthers Thraiter an' th' other hisses Miscreent ye can bet they're two dimmycratic leaders thryin' to reunite th' gran' ol' party.
Finley Peter Dunne, Mr. Dooley's Opinions (1901), p. 93
When 'tis an aven thing in th' prayin', may th' best man win … an' th' best man will win.Finley Peter Dunne
Glory Be, whin Business gets above sellin'tinpinny nails Durkheim in a brown paper cornucopy,'tis hard to tell it fr'm murther.Finley Peter Dunne
Even an Englishman was niver improved by bein' blown up.Finley Peter Dunne
Th’ dead ar-re always pop’lar. I knowed a society wanst to vote a monyment to a man an’ refuse to help his fam’ly, all in wan night.Finley Peter Dunne
Thrust ivrybody but cut th' ca-ards.Finley Peter Dunne
A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks th' Lord wud do if He knew th' facts iv th' case.Finley Peter Dunne