The only reason why God created man is because he was disappointed with the monkey.
The buzzard told the monkey "You're chokin' meRelease your hold and I'll set you free"The monkey looked the buzzard right dead in the eye and said"Your story's touching but it sounds like a lie."nat "king" cole
But then, after all, we are all alike, for we are all derived from the monkey.Albert Einstein
Year by year, the monkey's mask reveals the monkeyMatsuo Basho
The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
I am not going to spend any time whatsoever attacking the Foreign Secretary.Quite honestly, I am beginning to feel extremely sorry for him. If we complain about the tune, there is no reason to attack the monkey when the organ grinder is present.Aneurin Bevan
"They make me look like a stuffed monkey"
A monkey is a much better voter than a socialist. Statistically speaking, if we assume that there are two options to choose from: the "A" and the "B" - the monkey is voting randomly, so its wrong 50% of the time. The socialist, however - is always wrong.janusz korwin-mikke
It is the simple truth that man does differ from the brutes in kind and not in degree; and the proof of it is here; that it sounds like a truism to say that the most primitive man drew a picture of a monkey and that it sounds like a joke to say that the most intelligent monkey drew a picture of a man. Something of division and disproportion has appeared; and it is unique. Art is the signature of man.gilbert keith chesterton
Ghostwritten ’s secret agenda is to offer up eight different answers to the question, "Why do things happen?" so it has the right to monkey about with time and history . number9dreams ’s secret agenda is to offer eight different answers to the question, "In what space does the mind operate?"david mitchell
What right do we have to claim, as some might, that human beings are the only inhabitants of our planet blessed with an actual ability to be "aware"? … The impression of a "conscious presence" is indeed very strong with me when I look at a dog or a cat or, especially, when an ape or monkey at the zoo looks at me. I do not ask that they are "self-aware" in any strong sense (though I would guess that an element of self-awareness can be present). All I ask is that they sometimes simply feel !roger penrose
The thing that has always disturbed me about O_DIRECT is that the whole interface is just stupid, and was probably designed by a deranged monkey on some serious mind-controlling substances. [*] [*] In other words, it's an Oracleism.linus torvalds
If a cartoonist wants to satirise Islam by drawing Mohammed, I’m on his side all the way. But among the 13,000 pictures on the EDMD Facebook page, you have Mohammed as a dog in a veil, Mohammed as a pig and Mohammed as a monkey. That’s not resistance, but picking a fight.
The show is over. The monkey is dead . . .
[Guybrush: What happened!?] Went to get your hand... [coughs] [Guybrush: You didn't have to do that!] [coughs again] Had to pay you back for all the trouble... Found Jacques... He told me... [Guybrush: What?] He told me... [Guybrush: What? What did the monkey tell you?]
A girl fighting a monkey! Now I can finally die happy!... Oh.
A buzzard took the monkey for a ride in the air The monkey thought that everything was on the square The buzzard tried to throw the monkey off his back But the monkey grabbed his neck and said "Now listen, Jack..." "Straighten up and fly right Straighten up and fly right Straighten up and fly right Cool down, papa, don't you blow your top."
Instead of holding on to the Biblical view that we are made in the image of God, we come to realize that we are made in the image of the monkey...lin yutang
Darwinian man though well behaved, at best is only a monkey shaved!
I confess freely to you, I could never look long upon a monkey, without very Mortifying Reflections.william congreve
And they brought an Owl, and a useful Cart, And a pound of Rice, and a Cranberry Tart, And a hive of silvery Bees. And they brought a Pig, and some green Jack-daws, And a lovely monkey with lollipop paws, and forty Bottles of Ring-Bo-Ree, And no end of Stilton Cheese.Edward Lear
Were I, who to my Cost already am One of those strange, prodigious Creatures Man, A Spirit free, to choose for my own Share, What sort of Flesh and Blood I pleas’d to wear, I’d be a Dog, a monkey, or a Bear, Or any thing, but that vain Animal, Who is so proud of being Rational.wilmot, john, 2nd earl of rochester