I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap.
All the sincerity in Hollywood you could stuff in a flea's navel and still have room left to conceal eight caraway seeds and an agent's heart.Fred Allen
Imitation is the sincerest form of television.Fred Allen
California's a wonderful place to live - if you happen to be an orange.Fred Allen
I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there.Fred Allen
A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognizedFred Allen
An advertising agency is 85% confusion and 15% commission.Fred Allen